OPINION

Nawwab and I: One Leg, Two Legs

April 01, 2010
temporal

N: Why do you smoke?
t: huh?
N: Why do you drink?
t: huh?
N: Why do you eat?
t: Next would be 'why do you breathe?'
N: Did I ask you about that?
t: I am not your hydrant.
N: We are in a foul mood today.
t: You badly need some canine counselling.
N: Therapy is the sole domain of the two legged beings.
t: Two legged? Ah...hydrant?
N:..yes I lift one and that is the difference between us and you.
t: We lift two legs? Squatting is decidedly not lifting!
N: We are not only in foul mood but are also a little dense.
t: Sometimes Nawwab you are impossible.
N: Missionary position. Woof, woof!

[later, by the fireplace, watching House]

N: Why do you watch House?
t: Because he is quite a character.
N: He is also much like us one legged beings.
t: Here we go again...OK....am all legs.
N: Sarcasm does not suit you.
t: I know you will lull me to sleep with your leg theory.
N: We are not selfish, we are not psychos...
t: ...yes, and you are not corrupt, and you do not hoard...
N: ...and are not hung up on manufactured gods
t: This is quite a long demolishing bark...Man...God....
N: ...and two legs.
t: Yaar bhago, so jao...kyun khamkhwa tung ker rahay ho.
N: And we do not divide beings under class or caste.
t: OK, if you are so good how come you did not invent the wheel?
N: Progress is an illusion. We have no need for it.
t: Just like the tooth paste?
N: And calendars and flow charts and progress reports.
t: Alright, so the animal kingdom is superior. Khush?
N: You must be tired also.
t: Foul and tired? That must be a lethal combination.
N: [hmmm...that means a short walk tonight.]
t: Let us make it a quick trip.
N: You were only half serious about canine therapy.
t: In case you are elevating yourself to PSD you are dead wrong.
N: We help mankind.
t: We train you to help us.
N: This is a bad way to begin April.

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love people who are in awe of words. words are the sole arbiter and the final survivor. desicritic editor, slave and slave-driver.
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