Why Write?
Deepti Lamba
Sometimes I wonder at the futility of writing. It isn't as if I stand to gain much from maintaining a blog or writing stories for the online world. Tomorrow if I am dead and gone, my blog too will die a quiet death. No one will pay GoDaddy and Daddy will give the tag line- oops this site does not exist or something along the same lines.
I know that along with my body my words too will go up in flames. I'm no Salman Rushdie nor a Stephen King. I am just an average woman writing mediocre crap. There is gonna be no one saying - hey whatever happened to whats her name with that swing or some shit like that?
No one asks after online phantoms, such is the virtual world and it makes me kinda depressed. My value here is nothing and my words carry no weight. Morbid, depressing thoughts with much truth in them. I feel blue when my mind meanders in that direction and there is no feel good answer here but dull acceptance.
I let fun become a passion and attached my giant sized ego to it. Thats the unvarnished truth- its a one person show and there are barely any viewers. When the curtain call comes it will all disappear.
Funny how my dying doesn't cause me discomfort but the worthlessness of my passion to the world makes me depressed.
Why is it not enough for me to be remembered as a good human being? Why do I want more?
I tell myself its stupid- once dead, nothing matters. Its one big nothing but it puts a damper on my spirits, takes away the zeal, the need to pen my thoughts down.
I know its the ego talking, the need to leave a mark on the world that is all mine but truth is only few get the privilege to live through their work or like Robert Jordan feel duty bound to finish their work before dying for their readers, such will never be my fate.













Varun P
URL
May 13, 2008
12:55 AM
Feeling pretty blue today, aren't you? Keep up with your online endeavours, who knows what may make you famous and immortal?
Sanjeev
May 13, 2008
02:43 AM
Ik Din Mit Jayega Mati ke Mol, Jag mein reh jayenge pyare tere bol
(One day you'll be sold at the price of dirt; what will remain in thw world is your words)
temporal
URL
May 13, 2008
03:06 AM
dee:
you write because you have an urge
if you don't you will die ... the "you" is both general and specific
will these resonate? yes they will ... through other writers' words
the ideas and ideals words paint have a life ... distinct ... of their own ... and live long
:)
Temple Stark
URL
May 13, 2008
03:41 AM
So this isn't a good time to point out grammatical errors?
Just kidding. Dee, mediocre crap exists but that's not your bag, baby. [This could have been horrible. Luckily I re-read my comment before hitting Publish and inserted a "not" before "your bag" that wasn't there before.]
I would slightly disagree that writing is just an urge. Some have an urge to also write well, and have it mean something to others. That seems to be what Dee is expressing, and surely I can understand that, because I often feel the same.
It's strange though that even when I was writing newspaper articles and getting generally positive to very positive feedback - especially about the features and profiles I wrote on places and things, it never seemed like much.
Of course I am grateful it was there, and looking back it probably kept me in the game longer than I would have stayed otherwise. Because it's not the writing goal I had in mind, which I still have, to write books, of novel or collected short stories.
Helping others improve their writing is a goal I have as well, however.
So goals are important, too.
It's why I think I'm about to ditch my political blog - because I didn't get in it to do all the writing there because my passion isn't reporting and op-editing about worthless politicians and their doings. And the worthy politicians already have a lot of publicity.
Dee, has an area of passion in her writing - and she knows it and knows what it is and her story-telling and narrative skills show most obviously in that arena.
It's not blogging necessarily, though that can mean a lot to people as well - obviously and thankfully. For some blogging is just the taste on the spoon while the real meal is getting cooked and ready for consumption.
Or it's masturbation while waiting for the real thing!
Deepti Lamba
URL
May 13, 2008
08:43 AM
The urge is very much there but Temple understood what I was trying to get at and I get the concept of goals or else its pointless meandering:)
temporal
URL
May 13, 2008
12:03 PM
"slightly disagree" is alright:)
on creative urge
there are many ways to kill a fly ... the motivation may differ from writer to writer ... the aim may differ ... presentation, grasp, chosen format, market, narcissism, adulation ... but from my vantage the overhanging cloud cover is the "urge"
this urge is the creative muse that wakes one up from deep slumber or if awake refuses to let one to go to sleep till it is fed a diet of words
sans urge, writing is automation ... it is "duty"
creative writing without this "urge" is a can of soda left open overnight
creative writing, while rewarding, seeks no reward
(names can be mentioned of artists, poets, sculptors who died destitute, hungry, weak and in obscurity but they never abandoned the "urge")
thanks TS for this opportunity
Ruvy
May 13, 2008
05:31 PM
Deepti,
I have to agree with Temporal here. You write because you are driven to. For some people, writing is therapy, even though it is a craft well practiced. I know this is so for me, and having read your writing and your blogs, I know it is true for you. Temporal is an artist. I am an artist. You are an artist. Face it, whatever else you do to make money you are an artist, driven as is an artist.
One of your stories still haunts me, young lady.
Now, if that isn't praise for a writer (aside from the loud applause the silent sound of folded rupees makes), what is?
Deepti Lamba
URL
May 14, 2008
08:06 AM
The thought that I cannot make a career out of my passion did me in at least as of now;) I keep telling myself that I am lucky to have time to devote to writing but yes for my 'art' I am grateful , need to revise my grammar ( I gotcha Temple!) and Ruvy thanks a bunch, your words meant a lot to me.
ushnishas
May 15, 2008
04:09 AM
I don't suppose Shakespeare wrote to make a mark upon the world, nor did mozart compose to be acclaimed a genius b all, nor any of the great oets and artists. They created for the love of creation, and to earn money to buy bread.
Many of them starved to death. Picasso was the first artist to become a millionaire through his paintings.
So write for the love of writing. For goodness' sake, there are so many ghost writers writing for so many famous "writers." At least you know that this is your own, and you earned the credit for it.
Deepti Lamba
May 15, 2008
07:03 AM
Both Shakespeare and Mozart were geniuses and I am not and both of them were well recognized for their crafts and they performed for the royalty.
True that Mozart died a destitute but that more due to being a self destructive person and less to do with his talent.
I do know a ghost writer and it is a living of sorts and no I see no reason why I should be complacent just because somewhere someone is less fortunate than I am.
Ruvy
May 15, 2008
07:53 AM
Shakespeare was not hailed as a genius when he lived. I don't know about Mozart. Shakespeare's work has long outlasted Shakespeare because he was a genius and because he wrote at a point in time when English was still in a developing stage. Chaucer is recognized for the same reason; in addition both used many of the same plots that had been floating around Europe for centuries.
And that is the point, Deepti. Your work is original to you. And you do not know whether what you write will outlast you.
Harish
URL
June 1, 2008
06:56 AM
depressed :-(
Deepti Lamba
URL
June 1, 2008
11:03 AM
So was I but the burden of the feeling has lightened tremendously;)
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