OPINION

Fiction: It Ain't Easy!

October 21, 2008
Deepti Lamba

It ain't easy for me to take off my clothes. I've never taken my clothes off in front of any one. Never. Never lifted my skirt to show my satin thighs nor give a peek of my high breasts under my shirt.

I've always been a demure girl. Kept my eyes down, away from men, away from acknowledging the lust driven thoughts they had about me. My body has always been modestly clad, my behavior exemplary and my chastity unquestioned.

And yet today I feel the need to lie against your heart. Feel your breath against my naked skin, your passion burn deep within my soul. The need to be with you overwhelms my senses and the distance between us a consent away.

I watch you watch me. I watch the desire to see me as I am flicker in your eyes. My taut musculature imprisoned in satiny skin demands freedom in the orgasmic moment of the little death.

Breath flutters, fingers twitch against the edge of the lacy button. You watch. Nary a move you make. Clothes, skin, modesty , embaressment? What lies between us?

It ain't easy to throw away years of shackled thoughts and be the mistress of unbrindled desires. It ain't easy to let the words - take me like a whore leave my lips. But those are the words I want to say in the stillness of this enigmatic night.

You smile and unbutton your shirt. Cool stiff cotton falls to the ground, a barrel chest exposed, a belly button pulled taut by the six pack abs.My tongue moistens my lips as I watch you step out of your trousers.

The bulge in the tighty whities make me avert my eyes. It ain't easy. Call it years of denying taking little lookies at the male crotch.

It ain't easy. All this ain't easy. Sex ain't easy. I step back and hit the wall and lean against it like a propped up scarecrow. You take a step forward.

Some one has to. Your lips meet mine. But it isn't a kiss. A resting of sorts. You take my hand and lay it against your shoulder. The muscle under the soft skin is firm. I let my hand slide down your arm, feel the downy hair, the bony wrist and let it rest there.

Holding your hand ain't easy. Accepting my role as a sex hungry being ain't easy.

You deepen the meeting of the lips. The pressure increases. The taste of bourbon and a cigar reminds me of a world I never knew. My fingers tangle with yours. Your tongue thrusts into my mouth gently making me lean against you.

Your semi-naked body brands me. You press our tangled hands against your burgeoning manhood and I squirm. It ain't easy to make aquaintance with a man's cock.

You chuckle against my lips. My- it ain't easy reaction amuses you. The virgin in me amuses you. My gawky reaction refreshes your jaded soul. And it ain't easy for me to accept your sense of victory over my downfall.

It ain't easy to accept the label of being the chastest virgin in town. It ain't easy to deny the vortex of desire I could so easily drown in. The bulge presses against my stomach. Your tongue suggests the motions of hot pleasure and moments of forgetfulness.

It ain't easy not to give in. It ain't easy not to let it all go to hell for one night passion with you- the priest of our parish. The town may call me a Jezabel and drive us out of town.

For the love of god it ain't easy to deny the fruit of passion that drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden.

Screw them all!! It ain't all that fucking easy. I take your hand and drag it up my thigh, up under my skirt, up inside my panties to that secret moist place that demands succour from the man dedicated to Christ.

It ain't easy giving in, knowing that we are sinning but what we have cannot be denied. Love, sex, sin - call it whatever you will, call it whatever the town will but tonight it ain't gonna be easy for me to deny our passion.

It ain't gonna be easy for me to sit in the confession booth and confess our sins to you come Sunday morning.

It ain't easy. It just ain't all that easy.

Deepti Lamba is a writer, an editor for Desicritics. She can be found at Things That Bang
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#1
temporal
URL
October 21, 2008
05:34 PM

dee:

well knitted

deceptively simple and flowing construct

(but am sure a lot of work went into that)

***

two minor quibbles

the first one here is am sure a typo:

Screw them all!!

query: what is it that cannot be effectively communicated with ONE exclamation mark?

the second?

take me like a whore

real lovemaking is not really a slam-bang-thankyou-ma'am activity

khair

this one is not a major quibble at all since the protagonist is not "wise" in the ways...

more power to your pen

#2
Deepti Lamba
URL
October 21, 2008
09:30 PM

Thanks for the inputs t:)

#3
suresh.naig
October 21, 2008
11:00 PM

Deepti;

Enjoyed the language and flow. esp I liked the similie, "propped up like a scarecrow", for the wide ranging picture this one word conveyed, a virgin's first and best encounter.

The inevitable for all of us is not, " to sin or not to sin", but "how to sin".

#4
Deepti Lamba
URL
October 22, 2008
04:44 AM

Ah!! The sin of it all especially writing it;)

Thanks Suresh, its been a while since I posted a story like this on DC.

#5
smallsquirrel
October 22, 2008
08:18 AM

((grins))

#6
Deepti Lamba
URL
October 22, 2008
10:55 AM

Oh i get it SS!;)

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