OPINION

The Right To Cuss

June 20, 2008
Deepti Lamba

I love cussing, people who know me know my need to act like foul-mouthed Ozzy but I surprised myself today. I tripped badly from a high ledge near a restaurant's parking lot post dinner, twisted my ankle badly and fell along side Parita.

The world blacked out, the food jumped to my throat and pain had me howling. Aaman and a dude nearby grabbed Parita, demanded whether I was okay and all I could think was - FUCK!! I am in fucking pain.

I was told Parita was fine despite the nasty fall. Somehow I managed to jump into the backseat of the car, Aayan very sweetly put my shoes in and Aaman drove towards the hospital.

The nausea and pain scrambled my brains and with every pothole that the car went over, I wanted to scream - Fuck Me Silly!! but the kids were in the car and I just howled and then realized that too was upsetting the kids.

Pain gave me the right to be foul mouthed but for once the legitimacy granted didn't make it right. I held back when they nearly toppled the wheelchair with me in it outside the hospital.

I had the right to scream- Fucking Shit but all I said was - Yaay!!

X-Ray time and it was again whimpers of pain - no screaming, no cussing!! I was trying to act prim and proper.

The doctor said the pain can be traumatic, sometimes patients even suffer blackouts. It set me wondering. For all my regular cussing when it really came down to it - I held back. Bad sprain, a shot of painkiller on my butt and a ride back home.

Currently I am hopping around the house like a one legged rabbit. It hurts bad but the foul mouth Dee seems to have disappeared.

Why?

Deepti Lamba is a writer, an editor for Desicritics. She can be found at Things That Bang
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#1
smallsquirrel
June 20, 2008
06:27 PM

bloody fucking hell, dee! :)
are you alright?

#2
Mahesh
June 20, 2008
06:51 PM

GOOD music GOOD Lyrics. I like it

GOOD music BAD Lyrics. Still I like it but not like with GOOD lyrics

So a word creates something in mind. Look at your guilty feeling. Your mind observed even in pain. Mantra is purely Sanskrit words but it has power to reach GOD.

So It is bad.

#3
Deepti Lamba
URL
June 20, 2008
10:20 PM

Mahesh, in my universe there is no God and it takes way more than cussing to make me feel guilty.

#4
commonsense
June 21, 2008
12:05 AM

Oh Shit! Hope you and the little one are fine!

#5
Mahesh
June 21, 2008
01:43 AM

your answer is very BOLD and strong.

Now all my confusion is that about your universe.

Does your universe has "EDGES"?

#6
Mahesh
June 21, 2008
02:19 AM

Hey, just a thought.

I tried myself the following words in my native language.

Oh Shit
bloody fucking
Fucking Shit
Fuck Me Silly
fucking pain

Oh very nice and wonderful to hear this words in my native language.

#7
Deepti Lamba
URL
June 21, 2008
02:36 AM

SS and CS- thanks guys I going batty sitting in one place.

Mahesh, yes its an edgy universe that exists in an eternal moment;)

#8
Jawahara
URL
June 21, 2008
05:17 AM

OMG, that sounds painful...and then not being truly able to cuss sounds even more torturous. Take care of yourself you.

#9
Deepti Lamba
URL
June 21, 2008
08:29 AM

Thanks Jawahara:)

#10
Aditi Nadkarni
URL
June 21, 2008
01:00 PM

Dee, that sounds painful. Hope you feel better soon.

I for one am a potty mouth and most times DC commentators bring me to the edge. But when there are rules, I dunno why I just follow them (I don't like being the bad kid who got sent to the corner). One such unstated rule is "No cussing in front of children". I broke that one for a while and then my friends' kids came up with an innovative law whereby if I cussed around them I have to pay them a quarter. Now the fear of being bankrupt keeps me from cussing around them.

I dunno if thats what kept you from cussing but it does sound like you wouldn't do it in front of your kids.

#11
Garam Beni
June 21, 2008
01:44 PM

oh we all hold back. ever cussed in front of your parents? the cuss machine grinds to a silent, involuntary halt as soon as we're in earshot of people we shouldn't be swearing in front of. Why? Just happens I guess. natural anti-faux pas hormones perhaps?(!)

Slightly off, the names - Ayaan and Amaan, are familiar. The sarod duo, by any chance?

And hey, get well soon! :)

#12
Deepti Lamba
URL
June 21, 2008
02:28 PM

Aditi, well Aayan says - so stupid all the time. He learned it at school and I find it really cute. Yeah I'm a bad mother but till the time the words are not directed at someone I see little harm. Put my head on the chopping block haven't I?;)

Garam Beni, I've cussed infront of my parents growing up. Fact is my elder sister and I even corrected my mom's pronunciation of a cuss word once. And she happens to be a genteel lady generally speaking. We still pull her leg over it;)

The names are more of a coincidence. The names have their meanings but will make others snooze if I try explaining them here.

#13
Deepti Lamba
June 21, 2008
02:31 PM

BTW- the so stupid is said when he plays the game Zuma and misses the balls

#14
Seema
June 21, 2008
04:32 PM

Ouch!! to say the least. Hope you feel better. I remember when I was in elementary school and heard cuss words for the first time.I thought they sounded cool and naively went around using them..until I got myself into trouble and realized the actually meant bad things!

#15
Deepti Lamba
URL
June 22, 2008
11:00 AM

Lol! Seema, thats happened to most of us. Much like a ciggie we start off thinking its cool and then it becomes a habit;)

#16
Ravi Kulkarni
June 23, 2008
01:51 AM

Dear Deepti,

Personally I don't cuss, but I am neutral about it. Why do you want to shield your children from cussing? It exists everywhere, so it is an accepted social practice. If you can answer that, you will find the answer as to why you can't cuss publicly.

A litmus test for the right and wrong: If you can't say it in front of your kids, don't say it.

Regards,

Ravi

#17
Deepti Lamba
URL
June 23, 2008
02:11 AM

Thats because I think cussing should be age appropriate just as shielding kids under a certain age group from violence and explicit sex.

I tend to cuss only around people who are okay with it and when I vent in my blog posts.

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