Movie Review: Mistress of Spices

Warning! This review contains spoilers. Don't read if you intend to watch the movie. Then again, I don't recommend watching the movie, so go ahead.

The Chillis have spoken! The movie according to them is: one you should stay away from.

Unless, that is, you are:

1. Bored to death and nothing could bore you more;
2. In dire need of a good laugh. Though that comes only in the end too, when you realise you have wasted good time and money watching a ridiculous film; or
3. An Ash fan. Then again, even Ash fans are going to have a hard time appreciating this film.

I love watching Indians act in English films. I don't know why, but I just do. Yet even that wasn't enough for save this sinking ship of a film. Seriously!

There was no story - at best it was a watery silly spin off something Indianish (love of spices!). But to think that the spices talk and that they are magical.... ooooohhhh ahhhhh.

Ash is this young Indian girl who has landed in San Francisco on a mission - to give spices to people in need to help them. There are many "Rules" her life is bound by. Of course in the due course of the film she breaks all of them.

The whole film is monotonous. She keeps narrating the film as it's going on and it's a surreal way of reading a very stupid book. I can't believe Dylan McDermott actually starred in this film. After My Best Friend's Wedding and The Practice where he's brilliant, this is a serious no-no on his bio.

The star of the film is undoubtedly the Red Chilli. It was brilliant right from the start where it told Ash to stay away from Dylan (if she'd listened, the rest of us wouldn't have had to sit through this film). It also played a major role in the very end of the film...instead of a bed of roses (I love you Bon Jovi) Dylan and Ash are on, you guessed it, a bed of red chillis.

Ow!

Kinkiness at it's best? Storytelling at it's worst.