In Search of My Alter-ego

If you have some time to spare, please answer this short questionnaire:

1. Does consuming cough syrup keep you awake while coffee puts you to sleep instantly?
2. Do you feel like killing the fellow desi when you meet him/her on a street and your courteous smile or "hi" is reciprocated with a nod of the head, with the "theekh hai jaa, lekin apun yahan dada, kya?" attitude?
3. Do you have a hard time remembering some stuff, like who cooked yesterday or what exactly were you working on three days back or if you went to the gym last week? Or if somebody suddenly asks what day it is? Do you sometimes also forget the name of some friend (yeah close ones with whom you aren't in contact with for the past four/six months) and then suddenly remember after two hours when that friend has beaten you till death. BUT you also remember some things which were said a bazillion years back by the SAME person, like a conversation where he was explaining his side of life, the photo of someone you liked, etc? Selective amnesia! So you have e-mail reminders sent to you for the most trivial tasks like classes/gym/cooking? Do you also.. arghh! forget it! I can't remember now.
4. Do you have a strong feeling that you have sixth sense, but it has only worked six times so far? And you don't even see dead people?
5. Do you "think" in more than one language?
6. Do you appreciate PJs because somebody put in some real brain work to create/crack it (mind you, it has to suck real bad)?
7. Do you start writing something and your digression ends up being longer than the intended post?
8. Do you like extremes, like Austin Powers, S.A.W, and Incredibles?
9. Did you ever dream of being a thug, a pilot, a businessman and a movie director, ALL at the same time?
10. Do you have trouble differenciating between internet and real-life, reel-life and real-life? Do you still think that when you hit a person, it would be accompanied by the "dishum" sound?
11. Do you quote excerpts from e-mail so that you dont forget to address or reply to all the points of the sender? Damnit! you see, I already covered this point in #3.
12. Do you like feeding donuts to Orkut servers?
13. Do you feel suicidal at the mere thought of Google's pages not working?
14. Do you introduce yourself as the "not-so-dark, not-so-short, not-so-handsome guy next door about whom your mom was afraid to warn you"? And expect not to get kicked?
15. Do you stop at odd numbers, because you are odd?

If you "happened" to have answered YES to all the above questions, I have at last found you, my alter-ego! Yes, we four had been searching for you right from the day we lost you while browsing the crowded Kumbh-mela.com. We four? Yeah, I, me, myself and Pavan. Please contact any one of us via this post. I shall reach you ASAP.

Me running towards the monitor in slow-motion, shouting: "My alter egoooooo" and I leave it up to you how you want to handle this situation.