Desicritics Comments on DESI Confusion

Comment by Vikas Chowdhry

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 19:03:47 EST

Suyog : There is a need for part two of this post because I want to write about how we unload this emotional baggage of cultural alienation over our kids. Of course, this might look like a series of clichés or restating the obvious because these things happen every single day in our lives and somehow we adopt a blasé attitude towards it all. Nachiketa: Appreciate your comment and enjoyed your post. Temporal: Interesting point. So what you are saying is that here I am, a DESI, who is bringing all these economic benefits to this country, so accept me as I am with my smell of curry, my inclination to break into vernacular at ever possible moment and most of all my arrogance that says that I am from a 5000 year old civilization, what can I possibly learn here that I've not already?

Comment by temporal

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 12:16:02 EST

Vikas: when a person moves adjustments are the order of the day...a good rule of thumb will be this: the adjustments made are directly dependent on distance moved my digressions: infusion not confusion we (desis) provide a greater infusion and add much more to the social, cultural and economic fabric of the countries we move in to...(generally speaking and based on my N.A. experience) we are already educated...meaning the local taxpayers have not spent a dime on us...we are hard(er) working and have a better work ethos ...(no flacks please, these are my observations;))...we tend to save more...make big ticket purchases....thus putting back in to the local economy...are generally more supportive of our kids taking up higher education...are more law abiding...the list goes on but suffice it to say you will get the drift... so the next time some one smells curry off our clothes and makes a face, smile and say salaam/namaste to you too:)

Comment by Nachiketa

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 11:24:15 EST

I have written similar articles on the H1-B experience (http://flying-donkey.blogspot.com) in the past. I think for the most part we face the issues that we do because of the disconnect b/w what we expected America to be and what the reality is. Also, the recent resurgence of India has made us re-evaluate our situation.

Comment by Suyog

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 10:26:06 EST

mmmh - dunno why there was a need of part 1 and part 2 to this article. I think this article was more or less what everyone knows and seems like an introduction to something... just my opinion. I was expecting more insightful rather than paragraphs of cliches. Suyog

Comment by Aaman

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 08:17:51 EST

Great post, Vikas, worth contemplating and reading.

Comment by Vikas Chowdhry

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 07:34:18 EST

Sujatha - Yes I did read your article on parenting and found it to be very insightful. I will write on issues surrounding parenting in the second part of my post. However, regarding the question why should we change, that attitude is probably summed up best by "WALTO - We Are Like This Only". I am not expressing any opinion regarding what should we change, or even if need to change but just making an observation of the FG experience (though if you'd really ask me - can we please stop talking in Hindi/Telugu/Marathi...or whatever the language might be in social settings and where there might be people within earshot who do not understand that language - it bugs the hell out of me). Of course, I myself am not above doing some of the things I describe here - indeed some of those things are my own personal experience.

Comment by Sujatha

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 05:03:08 EST

Vikas, rather than characterizing it as confusion, I would say that immigrants are very aware of their history and their legacy. I think it is human nature for immigrants to be wary of their new surroundings to begin with, but slowly and surely, we all integrate, in our own unique ways. "Confusion" tends to suggest not knowing how to go about things, but in the initial years we are just trying to figure our way around things. Any immigrant in any foreign country would go though experiences similar to ours. I don't know if you had a chance to read my essay on immigrant parenting that I sent you, but the message that comes through there is one of success - immigrant parents not only integrating themselves into their adopted societies, but also rasing children who are aware of their history and their future. I'm not saying that every single thing you describe does not happen. It does. But so what? If you are suggesting we should change, how should we and why should we?